Episode 2
Day 4
Presenter: Good morning contestants, minus Machoke. No time to dally – we’re going to jump straight into your fourth challenge, which is called To Combee Or Not To Combee. I need you now to split yourself up into 2 groups: a group of 4 who are selfish and a group of 5 who are selfless. You have 15 seconds.
Presenter: Okay contestants, it’s time to fully explain today’s challenge. Behind me are two huge Combee hives, both full of Combee busily making Sweet Honey. The Combee have been trained to use these special hives which we have rigged up to the giant taps you can also see behind me. What you will also notice are the two huge running wheels attached to the taps. Both groups must nominate one runner, who will be responsible for turning the wheel, which will gradually release Sweet Honey from the taps. Once you have a cup full of Sweet Honey, you must take the cup to the tank located at the other side of this field… oh dear, would you look at that? Someone has placed an obstacle course in the way!
Clefairy: Wow… that’s pretty inconvenient but what a lucky coincidence! ^_^
Presenter: … yes, quite. Only one contestant from each group is allowed to be on the obstacle course at any one time, and you have one hour in which to get a combined level of Sweet Honey in the tank, to the extent the Sweet Honey reaches the line marked clearly on the side of the tank. Passing this challenge will earn you 20,000 for your prize fund. Of course, you can’t see how much Sweet Honey is currently in the tank, so you’d best keep going for the whole hour just to be on the safe side. Now, do we have nominations for runners?
Prinplup: Well don’t look at me, I’d get all sweaty and… urgh.
Raticate: I don’t mind doing it for our team then.
Slowking: I… will…
Kricketune: No offence Slowking… I think I’d be better off doing that.
Presenter: Okay, so Raticate and Kricketune will both be the runners. You are not allowed to change runners during the course of this challenge – to do so will result in instant failure of the challenge, so do use your energy wisely. Oh, and I nearly forgot. Raticate – being the selfish runner, you are in a very interesting position. Obviously your team is likely going to need to work harder, having less members. But we’re prepared to make things easier for you in that sense. If you request so, your wheel can be made to spin at a constant rate by itself – producing a lot of Sweet Honey without any effort on your behalf. Should you choose to do that, the prize money available for this challenge will be halved. You however, will earn an exemption – a free pass into Episode 3. Something to think about there. All contestants are forbidden from discussing this offer during the challenge. If you’d like to take your positions, the challenge will begin shortly.
Raticate: You did WHAT?
Prinplup: Well I grazed a fin squeezing through that AWFUL tire. I had to abandon the honey really. Had no choice.
Raticate: You know what guys, I am NOT running by backside off for you lot to do things like that.
Clefairy: Oh come on peeps! It’s a lovely day! Let’s enjoy ourselves ^_^
Farfetch’d: Did you manage the assault course okay Clefairy? No falling over? We don’t need to call health and safety?
Clefairy: Nope, and the Sweet Honey is veeeeeeeery sweet indeed ^_^ positively delicious ^_^
Raticate: You ATE some?
Clefairy: Only a little bit ;;
Raticate: Okay sod it, I give u-
Smeargle: Give up? You can’t give up. You’re a rat aren’t you? Practically a hamster? You should be an expert at this.
Raticate: You lot wanna bugger it up? Fine, just don’t expect me to work myself to my little Pokémon bones for you lot to just muck about. I’m off; my wheel can spin by itself. I’m taking the exemption.
Presenter: Okay contestants, Slowking did just about manage to empty his first cup into the tank in time, so let’s remove the front off the tank… ooh, would you look at that! JUST over the line! Congratulations, you’ve passed the challenge. However, due to Raticate’s decision, you earn just 10,000 for the prize fund, taking the total to 35,000. Raticate, you will also be exempt from the next elimination – guaranteeing you a place in Episode 3. Your next challenge will take place tomorrow morning on the beach. I’ll see you there.
Farfetch’d: I guessed Machoke on yesterdays quiz and yet it is Machoke who has departed… so why am I still here? Something suspicious is definitely going on.
Kricketune: Some suspicion is naturally going to fall on Raticate, but I have to wonder whether she did it for the good of the team? Is a near guaranteed 10,000 better than a risk at 20,000? I wonder more about Smeargle. She’s very provocative.
Mawile: Farfetch’d didn’t say much today. Would contacting health and safety have wasted time? Presumably what we were doing was neither healthy nor safe.
Mothim: I can’t believe we lost half of the potential prize money today. That’s really quite depressing. Raticate has to be looked at for that.
Prinplup: How can Slowking take so long to complete one journey? And he didn’t even have a sore paw like me.
Raticate: My pride is damaged - I am NOT a hamster. Clefairy is very annoying and erm… EATING the honey? Stupid girl.
Slowking: Too… tired to write much. Very… very… v…e…r…y long distance travelled… today.
Smeargle: My ingenious plan worked. Raticate and I must look very suspicious now. I really should have volunteered myself; could have done with that exemption. I still think Prinplup is a bit surreal. Fancy giving up halfway to the tank. We could have failed the challenge because of that – it was pretty close in the end.
Day 5
Presenter: Contestants! It is another beautiful, hot day here, and today’s challenge is called Yellow Submarine. I’m sure you all know that Boon Island is famously where the hit Pokémon band The Pinsirs were formed, enjoying what feels like trillions of hit singles around the Pokémon world. So today we thought we’d pay homage to them with a quiz about their music. It’s oh so very simple – I’ll give you, one at a time, a line from a famous Pinsirs song, you sing the next line back to me; the singing is very important, of course. If 6 of you can correctly name the next line, we’ll add 25,000 to the prize fund. We’ll go in order you’re sat around me from left to right, so Clefairy you’ll be going first.
Clefairy: First? ^_^
Presenter: Yes. First.
Clefairy: How exciting ^_^
Presenter: Are you ready?
Clefairy: Yes ^_^
Presenter: “For well you know that it’s a fool who makes it coolâ€â€¦
Clefairy: ^_^ … oh erm, I don’t have a clue ;;
Presenter: Are you sure?
Clefairy: Yes ^_^
Presenter: The next line was “By making his world a little colderâ€. No correct answers as of yet. Slowking, you’re up next. “Love was such an easy game to playâ€â€¦
Slowking: Erm…
Presenter: …
Slowking: …
Presenter: …
Slowking: …
Presenter: … no?
Slowking: Now… I need a place… to hide… away.
Presenter: Correct, eventually. One correct answer achieved. Farfetch’d, you’re up next. “There's nothing you can know that isn't knownâ€â€¦
Farfetch’d: Erm… nothing you can see that isn’t shoooooooooown.
Presenter: Correct again, two correct answers out of three achieved. Raticate, you next. “And when the broken hearted people living in the world agreeâ€â€¦
Raticate: Ugh, so soppy. There will be an answer, let it be.
Presenter: Three correct answers out of four, well done. Mothim, you next. “And he told us of his life, in the land of submarinesâ€â€¦
Mothim: … so we sailed on to the sun… in our yellow submarine?
Presenter: Incorrect, it was “Till we found the sea of greenâ€, not “in our yellow submarineâ€. Three correct answers out of five as it stands. Mawile, you’re up next. “It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dogâ€â€¦
Mawile: Erm… it’s been a hard day’s night, I should be sleeping like a log.
Presenter: Correct answer again, four correct answers out of six. Prinplup, Smeargle and Kricketune, I need two correct answers between you to win this challenge. Prinplup: “And now my life has changed in oh so many waysâ€â€¦
Prinplup: Erm… we all live in a yellow submarine? I’d consider that a changed life.
Presenter: … no. The answer was “my independence seems to vanish in the hazeâ€. Smeargle and Kricketune, you must now both answer correctly in order to pass the challenge. Smeargle, your turn now. “Say you don't need no diamond ring and I'll be satisfiedâ€â€¦
Smeargle: Tell me that you want the kind of thing that money just can't buy.
Presenter: That is correct, so Kricketune it all rests with you I’m afraid. “Yeah you got that something, I think you’ll understandâ€â€¦
Kricketune: Oh god… when I say that something, I wanna hold your hand?
Presenter: Correct answer! Well done contestants, the challenge has been passed and your prize fund now rises to a whopping 60,000, an excellent amount. It could get even better tomorrow, but remember that tomorrow you will also face the second quiz and elimination. I’ll see you tomorrow night by the waterfall on the east of the island.
Smeargle: You mean you’ve never listened to them before? I assumed everyone had?
Kricketune: You know human beings have a similar band? Can’t remember the name… The Butterflies? Something like that anyway.
Raticate: My favourite album was Anthology 3, some good tunes on there.
Slowking: I… am going … to bed. Good… night.
Mothim: Goodnight Slowking.
Mawile: … how can it be so slow?
Smeargle: Well they all are aren’t they? By definition. Slowking really annoys me though. Looks so gormless half the time.
Mothim: What if we hadn’t passed the challenge today? We should be more careful in future.
Kricketune: But we passed it didn’t we?
Mothim: But… we were so close to failure. And if we have more situations where we have to get something right and only have one chance we’ll probably lose a lot of money.
Mawile: Yeah. Or we might all die tomorrow and it won’t matter anyway…
Farfetch’d: Oh they wouldn’t let us die… right? Not this early anyway? … You don’t think they’re listening to us do you?
Raticate: It’s a reality show, of course they are. What time is it anyway?
Prinplup: There’s a clock behind you. 2:34am, to be exact. Anyway, I think my hair is dry now, I’m off to brush it. See you all tomorrow.
Raticate: I’m going to bed as well. Night.
Clefairy: Bedtime sounds fun ^_^ It’s awfully late.
Smeargle: Goodnight.
Clefairy: Oh, before I go ^_^ do any-…
Smeargle: - Just go to bed.
Clefairy: Okay, goodnight ^_^
Mawile: I didn’t know Prinplups had hair…
Farfetch’d: I noticed a group of Wailmer watching us from the sea today… was it a clue? Or a form of sabotage designed to distract us? Or maybe they were spying on us? Maybe this heat is designed to distract us as well? They’re cleverer than we all know.
Kricketune: Smeargle answered her question today without even hesitating. Did she already know the question beforehand?
Mawile: I didn’t think there was much to help today. Possibly a day without sabotage. We’ll have to see what tomorrow brings. Hopefully some rain.
Mothim: These challenges must be the easiest to sabotage, so maybe I should be looking towards those who answered incorrectly?
Prinplup: I can’t believe I got sand in my flippers… AGAIN. Slowking was very slow to answer today, could have been taken as an incorrect answer. Definite possible sabotage. Good job I know how to keep cool, it’s going to be hard to sleep tonight in this humidity.
Raticate: The heat is stifling, makes it so hard to concentrate. Why has nobody mentioned how Clefairy looked so happy to start yet clearly knew nothing about The Pinsirs? Very suspicious again.
Slowking: I… think Mawile… could be the… PokéMole. Although Prinplup… gave… a… very stupid… answer.
Smeargle: Probably the most famous Pinsirs song of all and Mothim didn’t even know the lyrics. The PokéMole is surely between him and Prinplup. He gave an answer that was so blatantly wrong.
Day 6
Presenter: Well contestants, to escape the heat we thought we’d bring you underwater for a little bit. Well, below the lake anyway. Today’s challenge is called Chuckle Like A Shuckle. As you can see, standing on the rock behind me is a Shuckle. This poor Shuckle is quite famous around these parts for being born without a sense of humour. He doesn’t laugh much, bless him. We’re going to give you all just two minutes to talk to Shuckle. If just one of you can make him laugh, we’ll put another 15,000 into the prize fund. If not we won’t. Simples. We’ll be doing this challenge in… hmm, reverse alphabetical order I think, so Smeargle, you’re going to be up first.
Clefairy: Does that mean I’ll be going last?
Presenter: If Shuckle hasn’t laughed by then, yes, it does.
Clefairy: Yay! ^_^
Presenter: … riiiiiiight. Okay Smeargle, please start.
Smeargle: Okay so erm… you don’t laugh? You should laugh. Laughing is good. Hahahahaha! See! … LAUGH GOD DAMN YOU.
Slowking: …
Shuckle: …
Slowking: …
Shuckle: …
Slowking: …
Shuckle: …
Raticate: You do know nobody will want to be your friend if you don’t laugh? Just crack a smile for god’s sake, it’d be a start. Okay okay, I’ll tell a joke instead. Knock knock. … I said knock knock. Okay, another one then. What do you get if you mix a Chatot with a Wash Rotom? A Poliwhirl! Hahaha! No? Why did the cutlery stick to the trainer? Because he had a Magneton! Hahaha! Where does a Snorlax sit? Usually wherever it wants to!! Hahaha!.... oh fine, suit yourself you useless lump of worm.
Prinplup: Isn’t it cold down here? … You been anywhere recently?
Shuckle: …
Prinplup: Any family to speak of?
Mothim: I think it sucks you don’t laugh. I understand that you know. I don’t laugh either. We should swap numbers.
Mawile: Just laugh. HOW can you not laugh. Laughing is positive, why wouldn’t you want to do a positive thing? I mean, what sort of IDIOT doesn’t laugh? Just crack a smile and see how good it feels. Just… YOU’RE NOT EVEN LOOKING AT ME! … Did you just YAWN at me?
Kricketune: It’s never too late to start laughing and feeling happy you know! Oooooh when you feel down, try positive thinking! That's what I told them and said, don't wear a frown, try positive thinking, laugh at your troubles instead! This crazy world that we live in, will keep on spinning round! But with good, strong, positive thinking, we'll get together and lifeeeee wooooon’t lettttt usssss dooooooooown!
Farfetch’d: … wait, is this some sort of secret test? Maybe you’re not really a Shuckle? Maybe you’re actually a robot that looks like a Shuckle and we’re just put here to end up looking stupid to entertain other people?
Clefairy: HIYA ^_^ What’s up Shuckle? You should be happy like me! Erm… a joke? Yes a joke! Don’t be so down, even though we’re below the ground ^_^ Get it, down, and we’re below the ground, that’s downwards, and I said down as in not happy down? ^_^ No? Erm… oh please don’t be upset and depressed, life is for living, just enjoy it ^_^
Presenter: Okay contestants, you failed to make Shuckle laugh, or even smirk come to think if it, therefore the challenge has been lost. It’s a shame the challenge wasn’t to make Shuckle yawn – you might be millionaires by now. Your prize fund at the end of Episode 2 is therefore frozen at 60,000 – still an excellent amount to have only two shows in. However, you all know what comes next. Right now we’re going to go straight to the Pokémon Center where you will all immediately sit the quiz, which will inevitably be followed by the next elimination. Please follow me.
Elimination
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